These days my life has become largely about our pregnancy. I keep telling people that this is the most exciting thing that’s happened in my life. I’ve had a lot of incredible experiences, but having a kid is going to be the top. I just know it.
The other day I was reading pregnancy and started reading a bit about miscarriages. You figure it’s good to be educated about pregnancy, since that’s where we’re at, and that involves miscarriages, especially during the first trimester. I don’t know about you, but it scares me a bit. In the medical community it’s called “spontaneous abortion”. Knowing that didn’t make me feel any better!
There’s a tiny bit of fear that lingers. Deb and I are a month into our pregnancy, so not out of the forest. And she just turned 35. That’s a milestone in child bearing, as I’m sure you’re aware. We’ve never had a miscarriage, but we’ve also never had a child.
It’s really that I’m just so excited, so hopeful, that I don’t know where I’d be if this little one doesn’t make it somehow. To anyone out there who has had a miscarriage, my heart goes out to you and them.
I know the ‘odds’ are in our favor, but you just wish there weren’t any odds at all! It doesn’t seem fair that we could get pregnant and lose those dreams. My heart breaks a little bit thinking about all the expecting parents out there who have hoped and dreamed and lost.
This just has to work out … this little one has to live.